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A common refrain in the manosphere is the allegation that society is rigged against men and in favour of women. “As a man, I feel left behind,� one 19-year-old told the Star in May, adding that when he reads the news, “it’s all about minorities, it’s all about women.� And the federal election in April showed a widening ideological gap between the sexes: although many Canadians, especially women, found Conservative Leader Pierre Poilievre’s anti-feminist message unappealing, it resonated strongly with young men.

Amid this backdrop, nearly half of Canadian men now believe not only that they’re asked to do too much in the name of gender equality, but also thatthey’re the ones being discriminated against. Many young men blame feminism for the challenges they face. They believe that policies aimed at fixing gender inequality have tipped the scales in women’s favour, that progressives don’t care about them.

Of course, we do care about young men’s feelings of denial and defensiveness, of alienation and loneliness and discontent: gender justice is not a zero-sum game, and progressivism doesn’t discount the very real challenges men face. And while these feelings don’t invalidate the experiences of women, they tell us something important about: we’re losing young men to right-wing, anti-feminist movements and the false sense of certainty they offer. Yet what’s actually certain is that men need feminism, and men need feminists. Indeed, we need to be feminists.

The notion that we need to return to more traditional, more conservative gender roles is popular among young men, 28 per cent of whom believe that “a man who stays home to look after his children is less of a man.�  Yet it’s been repeatedly shown that traditional gender roles are not merely unequal; they’re also destructive and lead to unhelpful, unhealthy, more challenging relations for both men and women. While many anti-feminists will bring up high rates of suicide and incarceration among men as evidence that they’re disenfranchised or overlooked, it’s rigid and traditional definitions of manhood — the kind that feminists have been fighting for decades to dismantle — that are at the root of these troubling statistics.

And despite what the anti-feminists might tell you, ours is not a gender-equal society. From the ongoing  wage gap, to the fact that women continue to do the majority of unpaid domestic labour, to the fact that more than half of Canadian women and girls have experienced unwanted sexual behaviours from men in public spaces, there is overwhelming evidence to disprove that notion. Two-thirds of murdered women are killed by an intimate partner, or 93 per cent when you include all male family members. Rates of intimate partner violence against women are nearly four times higher than against men. In fact, the best way for women to protect themselves in Canada is to avoid having close relationships with men at all.

Think about that. Say it out loud, and then say it again.

For these reasons and others, the movement toward gender equality must be centred on improving the lives of women, particularly those from marginalized communities. But it’s important to recognize that greater gender equality is better for us all.

Men’s mental health, once overlooked, has become a greater priority as we’ve come to acknowledge the vulnerabilities and fears that men have, as well as the impacts of rigid and unforgiving masculine norms. Social agencies report that men and boys have become more engaged as we’ve moved away from rhetoric that makes all men the problem. Fathering programs have expanded the ways that dads can support child development and nurture healthy relationships and gender expression, endeavours once seen as unmanly and unacceptable.

As feminist researchers, educators and activists, we’ve seen how feminism can help men and boys develop the knowledge, capacity and courage to defy the adversities that impede happiness and prosperity.

Put simply: gender equality needs men and boys, and men and boys need gender equality. Say it out loud, and then say it again.